Who is popular today?

KANISA GEORGE

The Greeks did it. The Romans did it. And now, 21st-century man is following suit. It's a lifestyle choice that defies social mores, yet others hold that causal sex perfectly defines a progressive-thinking society.
The dawn of the new millennium birthed radical views on sexuality and challenged widely accepted concepts of ethics and morality. Feminist thought provoked and reimagined a woman's place in society and a woman's relationship and interaction with sex.
Today, questions have been widely canvassed on the utility of sex, and now with the rise of casual sex, it appears ethical perspectives on sex are being further undermined. This brings to mind several questions on the social construct of sex: what caused the shift in normative principles surrounding sex, and more fundamentally, what is the purpose of sex?
In his provocative essay titled "What is sex for," researcher David Halperin considered the latter. He found that when we think about sex, there must be a why and this is directly linked to human beings being notoriously curious.
Why then do we engage in casual sex?
In an attempt to curb self-indulgence, stoics managed to fit sex into a scheme of meaning; indulging in the pleasure of sex was alright, as long as it was for the purposes of making babies. There is no dispute that we have moved away over yonder from this point, but it does force one to question the value we now place on sex and why we need to keep things casual?
In an article titled "Consent was never enough," writer David French discussed the rise of casual hook-ups and the potential dangers of these arrangements. He examined modern sexual morality built around consent and the idea that all things are permissible so long as consenting adults enthusiastically participate.
Foster wrote that young persons were engaging in sexual encounters they didn't want for reasons they disagreed with. This, the article continued, was heightened by pornography which made extreme sexual acts mainstream and the proliferation of dating apps that impress upon us that new options are around every corner.
The Greek philosopher, Aristotle, puts an exciting spin on the "why" surrounding sex. He believes that to be loved is preferable to intercourse, according to the nature of erotic desire. And as such erotic desire becomes more of a desire for love than for intercourse. For Aristotle, love is the telos of erotic desire. It is not love that aims at sex as its goal, but it is sex that aims at love. The real reason we have sex is not that we want to have sex but because we want to love and be loved.
This seems far removed from modern-day views on sex, which, if I'm honest, hinges significantly on enjoyment. Enjoyment, quite frankly, might have a lot to do with it, and while the "why" surrounding causal sex is an exhaustive list, if I were to take a wild guess, pleasure might be at the top. Consensual sex outside of a romantic relationship or marriage without any attachment or expectation of commitment or exclusivity is often used as a healthy sexual outlet.
Others simply want to enjoy a physical experience without the pressures of a traditional romantic relationship. Surprisingly, studies suggest that sexual exploration can support a healthy transition to adulthood as it allows individuals to understand their sexuality in a low-pressure environment. It also boosts self-esteem, provides relaxation, sexual pleasure, and self-awareness and allows us to experience feel-good hormones.
Gigi Engle, a sex educator, doesn't think society should view casual sex negatively. She believes that every negative side-effect of casual sex has deep puritanical roots born from slut-shaming and living in a society that has conditioned us to think sex has to have emotional meaning to be good.
But for some who have tried this new form of sexual morality, they haven't just found it wanting, they've found it profoundly harmful, according to one writer.
Critics see the high rates of casual sex as an endemic dominating society and wreaking havoc on our ability to establish stable relationships.
Anthropologist Peter Wood called the rise of casual sex an assault on human nature and argued that even the most meaningless-seeming sex comes with a problematic power imbalance. In addition, studies have found a correlation between casual sex and various negative mental health consequences like anxiety, sadness, regret, depression, and poor self-esteem.
But it isn't all bad. Similar studies have found that casual sex positively impacts self-esteem, relaxation, sexual pleasure, and self-awareness.
Truthfully, the rise of what we deem a culture of hooking up isn't new. But because of its prominence, some people, especially younger individuals, have casual sex because they feel they can't afford not to or are surrounded by a culture that says they should. Shouldn't the desire for a deeper human connection always win out?
It's fair to say that the rule book no longer exists. So, I guess in the end, it's all about the individual, and I suppose having sex in a way that makes you feel good about yourself might be the most important thing.
The post It's all very casual appeared first on Trinidad and Tobago Newsday.