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But men are men;The best sometimes forget.- ShakespeareWhat does it take to be a man? A great deal of effort, a whole lot, plenty of things, some good, others bad, to make up the mosaic of what a man is supposed to be. It's complex, not simple, it's a riddle wrapped up in an enigma, a mystery that not many people can decipher, although they think that they can. How many times have you heard women say, "Oh, I know my man to the tee, I have him figured out," only to be shocked by his subsequent behaviour?"What is man? A miserable pile of secrets," said Dracula.And yet Shakespeare said:"What a piece of work is a man!How noble in reason, how infinite in facultyIn form and moving,How express and admirable!In acting how like an angel!In apprehension, how like a god!"Wow, that's quite a commendation for man, even though many women would take umbrage with that description. Well, I'm a man, and it sounds good, so I'll accept it in the spirit that it was given.Despite those fine words though, there are many men who feel as if they got the short end of the stick, disrespected, maligned, downtrodden and taken advantage of. This was made even more apparent to me when I ventured upon the word "manosphere", which more than opened my eyes even more to the sorry state that some men are in and why they are more than a bit concerned about the plight that has befallen them.The manosphere, that's where we'll dare to venture today, right after these responses to what I had to say about 'Men juggle, women multitask.'Teerob,Women have been multitasking for years, but are so good at it that many men aren't even aware of their ploy. But figures do not lie, and the fact that so many babymothers exist with so many different fathers for the children, and the even more glaring statistic that over 38 per cent of men tested are NOT the biological fathers of their assumed children, is evidence enough. Yes, women multitask, but they do so in secret.EricaHi Tony,There are those women who don't care to juggle or multitask when it comes to relationships. They are quite open to the men in their lives, bearing children for more than one man, demand child support payments and for the men to be present in their children's lives. Some may say that these types of women are 'loose', but I say that they should be admired for standing up against men who merely want to juggle.SandraI stumbled upon a new word last week - manosphere. It really intrigued me, so naturally, I had to do my research. The manosphere is a collection of websites, blogs, and online fora promoting masculinity, misogyny and strong opposition to feminism. Communities within the manosphere include men's rights activists, Incels (Involuntary celibates) who I've written about in the past, Men Going Their Own Way (MGTOW), Pick Up Artists (PUA), and fathers' rights groups.I do know about Father's Inc, the group that represents single fathers, but the manosphere is all new to me. When you think about it, it was bound to happen, as a counterfoil to all those feminist groups that have sprung up over the years.There was the feminist movement back in the 70s and now the Me Too movement, so men simply had to find a voice of their own for fear of being beaten into extinction, shunted off to the elephants' graveyard, made redundant.The manosphere seeks to right the wrongs that women have meted out to men, it seeks to empower men, to give them a purpose, self-esteem, and to have a platform of their own. It's sad when a man becomes a misogynist, a hater of women, but at times he is driven to it by terrible experiences that he had in his past, sometimes from even his own mother.Now, some of you may ask, do men really believe all those things, aren't men the stronger sex, isn't it a man's world where men call the shots? Well, apparently the answer is no, no, no, as many men feel disenfranchised and emasculated.American songstress Skeeter Davis sang, 'It's hard to be a woman,' but nobody ever sang that it's hard being a man. That's because perhaps men prefer to keep their frailties under wraps, not expose their vulnerable underbelly, protect their Achilles heel.Instead, men lap it up, suck it up, take it on the chin like a man, take one for the team without complaining, and not show any hint of weakness."Roger, yu woman pack up and gone, yu allright?""Yeah man, everything good."A man has to be strong and dare not show anything else, dare not cry. if he does, he is ridiculed; if he confides his fears, he's deemed a weakling; if he allows his woman to abuse him without retaliating, but instead reports it, he's called soft and laughed at, even by the very police who he reports it to. And yet, he is chided for not being open, not being sensitive and showing his feelings."Look how I bare my soul to you, and all that you could do is tell your girlfriends and laugh behind my back."And that's why most men will keep their feelings bottled up inside, never daring to utter one word of discontent or anxiety, for fear of having it thrown in their face.When actor Tyrese Gibson cried online in regards to not seeing his daughter for two years, people laughed at him. When actor Will Smith reacted badly on live TV to his wife admitting that she had an affair, people laughed at him. Yet folks wonder why men don't open up more.A man has to make sure that his female side never rises to the surface, not even a hint of it, for a real man is 100 per cent masculine. But that's so much emotional pressure, and pressure buss pipe. All that emotional turbulence bottled up takes its toll on the man, especially when dealing with a woman. That's why most men die before women.I was recently in conversation with a young man who's in the throes of divorce from his wife of 18 years. He's a man who's hurt, bitter, and angry. He told me that in marriage, it's the woman who has everything to gain, it's the woman who mostly calls the shots, albeit in a very subtle, covert way, so insidious and imperceptible that most men don't even feel it.His theory is that marriage is give and take, the man gives and the woman takes."Men always give in to their wives, always trying to please her, and the wives take and take and take until they suck the very life out of the man."To add to that is the feeling that if you do 10 things for a woman 10 times and cannot do it one more time, she makes an issue of it."I'm sorry, I can't do it today.""Say what, but I want it done, you're so mean."At that point, I reminded him of the quote by Henry David Thoreau, "The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation," to which he jumped up and shouted, 'That's it, that's true, that's me, that's been my life for the past 15 years of marriage."A man has so many expectations to live up to. He has to shine like a beacon even when his light is dim, exert great strength even when his muscles are failing, put forth the face of bravado even when he's feeling fearful, and show fortitude at all times. That can be exhausting, and many women exploit this.Women haven't got to display all those characteristics and all that they do when ready is turn on the tears, prey on the man's vulnerability and bring him to his knees. Samson was reputed to be the strongest man in the world, yet he was brought down by a woman. What chance do other ordinary men have? is the question that men ask.To add to that, a woman uses her sexuality as a tool, a weapon, a fulcrum for leverage. A man's sexuality is of paramount importance to him, one that he has to always live up to. Yet it has no guarantees. Take it away and he feels less than a man, emasculated, exposed, broken.I see many young men who are prime candidates for the manosphere movement. They are disillusioned, aggrieved, and angry. Some are men by gender only, but their actions say otherwise. Many are borderline feminine, a condition brought on by overprotective or domineering mothers or absent fathers. Many are lost, living in a gender-neutral world at the nexus of an emotional dimension, a purgatory, floating between Heaven and Hell.No wonder movements like manosphere exist and grow.More time.Seido1yard@gmail.comFootnote: Being Jamaican is a gift, and honour, so much so that many people of other countries want to be like us. They love our culture, our music, dance, language and food. And yet there are some Jamaicans who seem to be ashamed of being Jamaican. They dislike the very things that others admire and emulate. They can't stand to hear our language when spoken, hate our music, have no idea of our history, yet embrace those of others. I'll always remember a few years ago when this prominent lady declared during a public enquiry that she doesn't watch or listen to local news, but only foreign news. Sadly, she is not alone, foreigners in their own country. If you want to hide something from some people, just publish it in a newspaper or put in our news media. Be Jamaican.